After 20 years pruning prose Austin Tichenor should be a master of brevity.

The veteran member and managing partner of the Reduced Shakespeare Company has winnowed William’s words for audiences across the world.

His latest curtailment William Shakespeare’s Long Lost First Play (Abridged) is a “new” play by the man himself, as discovered in a Leicester car park.

It will be performed by the self-titled bad boys of abridgement at Wilton’s Music Hall from Tuesday, March 28-April 1.

But do Austin’s powers of abbreviation spread beyond the stage?

We challenged the American to answer our reduced interview to find out. Five word questions and three word answers only please.

Name, age and job title.

Austin. Timeless. Creator.

What is this show about?

Ninety minutes long.

What is it inspired by?

Shakespeare’s glorious characters.

How did you survive Leicester?

Taking mild hallucinogens.

Are you really bad boys?

Yes. The baddest.

The hardest part of reduction?

Finding the gist.

Strangest gig you’ve ever done?

Answering these questions.

Do you enjoy wearing tights?

OMG. Who doesn’t?!

What’s your favourite Shakespeare play?

Whichever one’s shortest.

Is Romeo heroic or stupid?

All the above.

Shakespeare character you’d kill off?

Iago. He’s trouble.

How important is Shakespeare today?

Very very very.

Create a fictional Shakespeare title

As You Dream.

Strangest English habit you’ve discovered?

Butter on sandwiches.

Thing you find most revolting?

Butter on sandwiches.

Where are you most happy?

Making audiences laugh.

The fastest you’ve ever driven?

30. (I’m slow.)

What’s your favourite fast food?

Neeps and tatties.

How do you mostly relax?

Bottles of scotch.

Has the world gone mad?

Yes. North-northwest.

How would Shakespeare handle Trump?

Kill him off.

Can America be great again?

Absolutely! (I hope.)

Worst review you’ve ever had?

“Really? That’s it?”

Where exactly do you live?

In my mind.

Wilton’s Music Hall, Tuesday, March 28-April 1, £10-25

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