Screen: Reviews

ACTION
Max Payne (15)
2/5

What do you do if your wife finds you in bed with your sister, watching Mark Wahlberg movies?

You switch off the TV and hope that she didn’t notice.

It’s safe to say that the actor formerly known as Marky Mark hasn’t achieved the status of Hollywood royalty just yet. Although he wasn’t the only one to blame for Tim Burton’s awful Planet Of The Apes remake at the turn of the millennium, he’s also an accessory to the wishy-washy Italian Job re-boot and the laughable return of Outer Limits-lite hack M Night Shyamalan in The Happening.

His latest film Max Payne doesn’t really break that trend. But what was anyone expecting? This was the project that cried “me too� as video games queued up to be remade on the big screen, despite the fact that it had neither the plot or the quality to make a huge impression.

Computer games are hard enough to film at the best of times, even when they’re works of solid gold genius like Resident Evil. But Max Payne: The Movie is a cookie-cutter tale of a cop-on-the-edge who tracks the killer of his family into a world of Russian assassins and slightly more supernatural forces.

So even though Wahlberg is steadily passable as the gruff lead, it’s not really an effort that’s going to redefine the genre. In fact, it falls into the trap of actioners such as Christian Bale’s Equilibrium and Keanu Reeves’ comic-book conversion Constantine, in that it wears too many of its influences on its sleeve and offers far too little on the side to get your attention.

Director John Moore throws in all manner of atmospheric rain-soaked shots in a bid to rescue the tone of the film, but he still can’t make the sun shine on Wahlberg’s latest outing.

COMEDY
Zack and Miri Make a Porno (18)
4/5

Kevin Smith is the king of loser comedy, but put him within 50 yards of a romance and he clams up like a 13-year-old chatting to Kelly Brook.

The man behind the fantastic video store escapade Clerks has struggled to blend his gobby and glorious flair into the world of charm and chocolates.

He probably came closest with the off-beat Chasing Amy, but the match-up of Ben Affleck and Liv Tyler in Jersey Girl was limper than a fried egg draped over a coffee table.

Fortunately, Zack And Miri is an ideal project for Smith, who can ladle a whole larder of screaming and swearing into a When Harry Met Sally premise that never has to get too serious.

Seth Rogen and Elizabeth Banks are teamed up as platonic room-mates who try to make a few extra bucks by shooting a skin flick, before inevitably noticing their feelings bubbling up to the surface.

This caper gives Smith the opportunity to hand more work to his crude but likeable Jay And Silent Bob co-star Jason Mewes, as well as controversial former porn queen Traci Lords.

Craig Robinson is great fun as producer and Starbucks drone Delaney, and the story itself is funny and sweet without becoming grotesque.

It’s been a little while since the man behind Mallrats had a film worth checking out, but Zack And Miri Make A Porno is certainly something you won’t regret furtively picking off the shelf.

FILM SEASON
O Brothers! The Coens In Context
BFI Southbank

The ever-interesting BFI is luring fans of fine film to the riverbank with O Brothers!, a month-long event focusing on the Coen Brothers and the films that inspired them.

Quite frankly, the mostly-excellent Coen back-catalogue is worth a look on its own, but there’s also a veritable toy closet full of sci-fi wonders, cat-and-mouse thrillers, satires and noir classics.

Cary Grant heads to divorce court in socialite comedy The Awful Truth, while Gary Cooper stars in Frank Capra’s fable Meet John Doe. Preston Sturges movies The Miracle Of Morgan’s Creek and Sullivan’s Travels get an airing, while the quirky noir Nightfall and the brilliantly-named I Married A Monster From Outer Space also make an appearance.

On the Coen front, the season is an ideal opportunity to catch the lesser-known but superb monochrome chronicle The Man Who Wasn’t There, as well as the ever-quotable The Big Lebowski, the gripping Barton Fink and Fargo, and recent Oscar smash No Country For Old Men.

Despite occasional mis-steps you could do worse than spend your winter evenings lounging at the BFI.
Go to www.bfi.org.uk