Save the panda - by cooking it

Perhaps one day we could live in a world where we can drive out to the country and look at the fields of pandas.

Unfortunately, being nature’s D student and rubbish in almost every way, I very much doubt pandas would taste good at all. In fact I imagine they would be rather stringy.

It may seem shocking to suggest eating some animals. But really if you eat one kind of animal, you should eat all of them. Unless they taste stringy. Anyway, apparently the Beijing restaurants that are officially linked with the Olympics have been asked to take dog meat off the menu for fear of offending people.

However, just because western culture finds dog eating abhorrent doesn’t mean it is actually wrong.
Why do pigs deserve to be eaten more than Labradors? Just because one is soppy and adoring and the other tastes great between two slices of bread. When in Rome, eat an Alsatian.

This hardly promotes an environment of respecting other cultures.

After all I am sure many Hindus find the idea of eating cows rather offensive but that has never stopped anyone. Why should we be more offended at the idea of eating man’s best friend? Or indeed Pandas.

Maybe soon the restaurants of Canary Wharf will be stocking Sumatran Tiger steaks, Peregrine Falcon eggs on toast and kebabs that are actually elephant meat and don’t just look like it.